Zyka - Menu

Sometimes when you have a day off you just want to relax and do nothing; wake up late, no cleaning, no chores, and maybe I'll put some pants on. This was one of... read more Sometimes when you have a day off you just want to relax and do nothing; wake up late, no cleaning, no chores, and maybe I'll put some pants on. This was one of those especially lazy days when I felt like blobbing around and couldn't even be bothered buying groceries, so we decided to order some dinner to be delivered. I thought, "Hey, OzBargain usually has coupons for EatNow... let's check that out!" The delivered food options around our place consisted of a bunch of generic pizza and Indian chains. Zyka seemed like a decent choice, considering the amount of positive reviews it had. We ordered the couple pack, which included 2 servings of rice, 1 serving of Pappadum, 1 serving of Raita, 1 Naan bread, and 2 curries. We selected a Beef Vindaloo and a Butter Chicken for the laaaaaady, as Jerry Lewis would say. We chose the garlic and cheese Naan, as well as a garlic Naan. For starters/sides we ordered a Seekh Kebab, Chicken Batter Fried and the 3-piece Lamb Samosa. I selected the delivery time to be 7:30PM, just in time for MasterChef. Shout outs to the chick that delivered the food at 7:20PM, what a champ. How would I describe receiving and eating the food? Hmmmm. Well... You know the feeling you have when you've been waiting for something awesome that you ordered online, obsessively following the tracking info for days? You're so excited that you use the closest thing with a hard edge to open the box instead of going to get a proper knife. Imagine that exact feeling but when you open up the package it's half a piece of poo (note to reader: you didn't order poo). It's not even a full piece. It's as if the prankster did a poo in a box and thought, "This fool doesn't even deserve a full poo. I'm going to cut it off!" *clench" "HAHA!" Exactly like that. All the meat was dry. Like flavourless jerky. The Lamb Samosa felt like it have been in the temperature-controlled holding display for hours. At 90 degrees celsius. Maybe the other two Samosa we're okay. I ended up biting into the other two and spitting them out. The pastry was like chalk. All the other sides were of a similar quality. Dry and bland. The curries were mediocre in flavour. The Vindaloo wasn't even as spicy as Nando's hottest option. The Naans were probably on the same quality-level as the typical Miss India. If the typical Miss India was run by poo-pranksters. Seriously, how did this place receive more than zero positive reviews? I wonder if the market for this type of atrocious food considers Zyka to be authentic Indian with their 5-Scoville total Vindaloo. These guys probably think they're the next Man v. Food host by being able to the handle the heat of a KFC Zinger. The little plastic sauce containers with lids was the best thing about Zyka. Zyka doesn't even care. They don't care enough to make decent food and it doesn't matter because all these fools will still end up thinking it's the best Indian they've ever had. These guys don't even care to stitch the images properly to make the panoramic background image on their website. Nice tiles, bro.

I think this restaurant needs to think of her eating new. for $18 per bowl with about 6 pieces chicken per bowl it is disgusting. to add this, the eating lukewa... read more I think this restaurant needs to think of her eating new. for $18 per bowl with about 6 pieces chicken per bowl it is disgusting. to add this, the eating lukewarm came. naan was okay. we have starved. not recommended.